


Harley versus The Roach

by BeatriceRedgrave



Category: Batman (Movies - Nolan), Batman: The Animated Series
Genre: Animated Series Style, Gen, Harley Makes a Beautiful Disaster, Henchclowns are expendable, Joker Might be Impressed, Somewhere between Heath and Hamill, This is funny in my head
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-13
Updated: 2019-06-13
Packaged: 2020-05-07 06:53:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19204162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeatriceRedgrave/pseuds/BeatriceRedgrave
Summary: The Joker is reminded why he keeps Harley around, and the hench-clowns are very afraid.





	Harley versus The Roach

It wasn’t the blood curdling scream that really caught his attention. Although, now that he thought about it, it should have, since he wasn’t hurting anyone.

Yet. 

No, the echo of the scream from moments before wasn’t what made him pause, mid-reveal of the evening’s plans. It was the shifty eyes of the hench-clowns in front of him. He was a dangerous man. When he talked, he had everyone’s attention. Right now, he did  _ not _ have their attention, and anything that might be a bigger threat to them than he was deserved a second thought. 

After a few more tics of silence, he decided whatever caused the scream had taken care of itself. He grinned, which retrieved all the attention he’d lost.

“As I was saying, boys, tonight’s about finesse. Anybody gets caught setting up the tripwires, and you might as well shoot yourself in the head, because it’s better than what I’ll do to you when I get my hands on you. Got it?”

One of the clowns grinned. “Don’t get caught tonight. Got it.”

The dumb one, the one who had spoken completely in earnest, was only the driver. The ones he’d acquired to actually do fancy electrical work in the tunnels under the armory were smart enough to just nod their understanding. They’d survive a few more days, unless somebody got lucky tonight.

A teeth jarring crystalline crash screeched through the room, making all the hench-clowns jump and stare at him, wide-eyed. Their mouths were all clenched shut, like they were afraid their teeth would just fall out from the bone jarring noise. 

He blinked. The clowns blinked. 

Then Harley’s enraged scream sent a throbbing pain through his head. He pinched his nose.

“Die you little bastard!”

Two more suspiciously porcelain crashes came from behind closed off walls, another angry, and possibly surprised, scream… then all went silent.

 

* * *

 

Harley stormed through the back door, crossed the back room and disappeared into the opposite hallway. He followed her with his eyes until she disappeared, but she never gave so much as a glance at the table of men whose attention she’d captured so wholly. She stomped silently back across the room and disappeared back through the original door from which she’d emerged. He followed the glint of steel newly shining from her grip.

While he’d only moved his eyes to watch her, the clowns turned their entire bodies towards where she’d disappeared. If he guessed correctly as to what she’d retrieved, and her level of determination - and he was pretty certain he was correct - facing her direction now was a mistake.

He ducked.

A huge, explosive boom blasted a body sized hole in the sheetrock wall separating her from the table of wide eyed men. Several pieces of porcelain knocked two clowns clean off their chairs and sent them bleeding onto the floors. Everyone else was, within a minute, coated in a thick layer of drywall dust and gradually increasing debris that was slowly flitting down from above.

The clowns seemed to have forgotten he was even in the room, the ones that weren’t twitching their last on the floor. He gritted his teeth into a grim smile just after hearing Harley’s excited victory cheer.

He stood, brushing off his coat, as she skipped out of the bathroom, waving the .45 mag around like it didn’t still have 5 more bullets in it. He watched her jump over a body and fling herself into a now empty chair, using the gun to emphasize her glee.

“Puddin’! You wouldn’t believe the size of the roach in the bathroom! I got him though.” She looked around. Five pairs of wide eyes, and one pair of black ones, stared back at her. Nobody was smiling, except ‘puddin’, and he didn’t look exactly pleased. “What?”

Yes, the smart ones on his team would last a few more days. Unless Harley came out to play.


End file.
